I think I've not come out of the depression state medically speaking, as the doc had said on my previous visit that all the feelings would prop up once I stop taking anti-depressants and same thing is happening. Life seems so hopeless because of this feeling, all because of that one person whom I love and care the most or rather I used to. I am unable to concentrate on things I need to, I feel I'll never be able to get the love of my life. My confidence has shattered, I've lost faith on myself, on my luck and on God. I am endlessly waiting for my life to get over. Nothing seems to amuse me.
Suddenly, something flashed into my mind. I imagined her coming back to my life. I think if she comes back nothing is going to change. I won't be trusting her anymore. I'll start hating my life even more for playing such a prank with me. Then what should be done to make myself feel better. To start thinking whatever happened was for good purpose. When will I see the day when I'll be the most happy. When will I see love in my life again.
I still cry during lonely nights, I feel heavy at my heart, I feel terrible. Life seems so hopeless and uninteresting without the love in my heart. This heart is filled with pain and guilt.
Enough of being Devdas and all those craps. What I am waiting for in my life is a beautiful wife with kind heart and cute kids and lots and lots of money.
No comments:
Post a Comment